Now, we all know how handsome and kissable the Mayor is, don’t we? (Indeed, we revealed only recently that more people want to snog Bozza’s Madame Tussauds waxwork than want to pucker up to either Brad Pitt, George Clooney or Johnny Depp).
Now, though, according to today’s super, soaraway Sun, BoJo has been involved in ‘a love rift’.
Yes. Not just a ‘rift’, but a ‘love rift’.
(Now, before you wonder why you haven’t heard about this scandal elsewhere, I should warn you that it ranks highly amongst the biggest non-stories that we at Boriswatch HQ have seen for a while. In a nutshell, the gist appears to be ‘person that Boris knows splits up with other half’. Still, that won’t get millions of readers to the website, so let’s continue trying to add some juice and gossip to a story where apparently none exists.)
Boris! Love! Rift! Scandal! Romp! (probably)
From The Sun: “LONDON Mayor Boris Johnson refused to comment last night on allegations that he was at the centre of a love rift. His friendship with socialite Helen Macintyre has been blamed for the break-up of her relationship with wealthy property adviser Pierre Rolin. Rolin was said to be furious about the amount of time she spent with the mayor, 46.
“Dad-of-four Boris gave Helen, 36 – who he first met when she was a student – an unpaid job as a fundraiser for London’s Olympic Park. She convinced Pierre to donate Â£80,000 to studies of the design for an Olympic attraction. Pals say Boris’s presence caused friction. The couple split last year.
“A spokeswoman said: “We never comment on the mayor’s private life.”
(It seems to us that this whole story is based on the single line “Boris’s presence caused friction”. He gave a woman he knew a job, her other half didn’t like it, and they split up. Hardly going to rock the core of our society, is it?)
Still, for the search engines: “Boris In Love Rift (no) Romp (no) Sex (no) Scandal”. There. That should do it.
*waits for millions of hits*